Entry tags:

nc-17

Queer as Some Folk (NC-17)
Title: Queer as Some Folk
Author: Sandy
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~3800
Category: M/M Slash, First Time
Spoilers: Season 2 through Conversion
Feedback: Is lusted after and adored
Summary: Rodney's tired of not having sex since coming to the Pegasus Galaxy, and so he devises what he thinks is a cunning plan.
Disclaimer: As much as I would love to own John & Rodney, alas I do not. I only make them have sex.
Prompt #48, Cunning
My John/Rodney Table
Not betaed. Just 3800 words of foolishness.

~~~

"I'm thinking about turning gay," McKay said apropos of nothing while they rested in the shade of a large rock on P7K-921.

Unfortunately for John, he'd just taken a drink from his canteen, and he nearly drowned from a mouthful of water. After he got his breath back - and pushed McKay away from him, the pounding on his back not helping a thing - he turned to the scientist and said, "What?"

Rodney looked at him in confusion and said, "What?"

"You said you were thinking about turning gay?" John said, and looked at his friend as if that big, beautiful brain had completely bypassed eccentricity and jumped right off the cliff straight into insanity.

"Oh," Rodney said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Yeah, that." He leaned back against the rock again, folded his arms over his tac vest, crossed his legs at his ankles, and wrinkled his forehead in a thoughtful manner.

"See, I overheard Cadman and Wainwright talking about watching Wainwright's Queer as Folk DVDs, and going on about what a slut some guy named Brian is, and how he's always picking up other guys in bars and taking them back to his apartment to have sex. And I thought, you know, that'd be kinda cool. Just pick up some random hot guy and have sex, no worrying about dating or, you know," he waved his hand in the air again, "conversation, just nice, uncomplicated sex." He sighed mournfully. "I really miss sex."

Sheppard just stared at him for a few seconds and then said, "Uh, Rodney, you do realize there aren't any gay bars in Atlantis, don't you?"

Rodney sighed again. "Well, yes, there's that."

Sheppard was grateful when Rodney dropped the subject, and after their break was over, he gathered up his team and continued their mission.

He'd pretty much forgotten about the rather bizarre conversation that had taken place on P7K-921 when one evening Rodney slid a tray onto the table across from John and sat down.

"Wanna join me for dinner, McKay?" John said dryly. Rodney took a bite of his bread and butter and rolled his eyes as he chewed.

When his mouth was nearly empty, he said, "Did you know that some of the scientists - well the soft scientists, which really, no surprise there - are gay?"

When John finished choking on the coffee he'd snorted, he snapped, "God dammit, McKay!"

"Sorry, sorry," Rodney said, though when John looked at him through watery eyes, McKay didn't look the least bit sorry as he shoveled a forkful of pasta into his mouth.

"So, anyway," Rodney said around a mouthful of sauce-covered noodles, "I was thinking that if it was okay to date a botanist, it would probably be okay to-"

"I swear, Rodney," John said through clenched teeth, "if you say what I think you're going to say, I'm going to take out my sidearm and shoot you."

Rodney looked at him in surprise. "Really, Colonel, I didn't realize you were so homophobic."

"I'm not..." John yelled. Glancing around, he lowered his voice and leaned forward to snarl, "I'm not homophobic! I just think there's a place and time to talk about certain things and this is neither."

Rodney stopped stabbing at his salad long enough to look thoughtful before he said, "Hmm, you may be right. I do want your advice though. Could we continue this conversation in your quarters?"

John rubbed at his forehead in an attempt to soothe the headache that was beginning to pound behind his eyes. "I don't want to continue this conversation, either here or in my quarters. You're not-" He shut up as Elizabeth stopped by their table.

"Is there a problem, gentlemen?" she asked, her worried command face firmly in place.

"No, no," Rodney said gesturing with the hand holding his fork and flinging lettuce dripping with Thousand Island salad dressing across the table. Elizabeth stepped back out of the way narrowly avoiding getting splattered. Rodney didn't notice having turned his attention back to his plate, this time stabbing up pasta for delivery to his busy mouth. "We're fine," he mumbled around his food.

John just shrugged and smiled. Elizabeth gave him a look that said she wasn't quite convinced, but she wished them good night and left.

"So," Rodney said. "Your quarters?"

John rubbed his pounding head and wondered if he could cadge some Tylenol off of whoever was on duty in the infirmary. "Fine," he said with a sigh. "I'll be off duty around eight." He stood, picked up his tray, manfully resisted coshing McKay over the head with it, and left the table.

~~~

It was almost nine before Rodney showed up, and John had just begun to hope that he'd forgotten. But of course, John's luck being what it was – after all, out of the entire away team, it'd been he that had gotten a giant, life-sucking bug stuck on his neck, not to mention the whole turning into a life-sucking bug thing – McKay knocked on his door, and John reluctantly opened it knowing that he was going to have one of the most ridiculous conversations he'd ever had with Rodney McKay.

"So," McKay said, standing there in John's room and bouncing on his toes like an overeager ten year old. "Would I be out of line asking one of the gay scientists for sex? I mean, I know that technically I'm their boss, but they're soft science, and I don't really have much to do with them. So, what do you think?"

And he stood there, eyes bright and eager and John really, really wanted to smack him.

"You can't do it, McKay," he said resting his hands on his hips and glaring at his insane friend.

Rodney's smile faltered. "But, why? I told you I don't really supervise them. And no one seemed to have a problem with me dating Katie Brown."

"You can't do it because you're not gay!" John yelled, his own hands flying around in emphasis.

"I could be gay," Rodney insisted. "How do I know I'm not gay if I've never given it a try?"

John's head began to pound again when he realized that Rodney thought he actually sounded reasonable instead of simply demented.

"And besides," Rodney said, his eyes beginning to light up again, "we're talking blow jobs. I like blow jobs."

"Rodney!" John said in exasperation, "I like blow jobs too, but I don't go around asking random men to give them to me!"

Rodney rolled his eyes. "That could be because you're, oh, I don't know, straight?"

"So are you!" John yelled again, flailing his hands about in agitation.

"I may not be," Rodney insisted.

"Well, let's find out," John ground out, apparently having reached the point where insanity became communicable. Grabbing Rodney's head, he pulled him into a kiss.

The kiss was hard and rough and angry, and Rodney stood completely stock-still. When John pulled back he snapped, "Well, you feeling gay now?"

Rodney stared at him with huge, blue eyes. He parted his slightly swollen lips, but no words came out.

John let go of Rodney's head, crossed his arms, and said with satisfaction, "See, I told you. You're not gay."

Rodney's mouth kept opening and closing like a goldfish John had once had that landed on the ground when the plastic bag he'd been carrying it in had broken. At last Rodney managed to squeak out, "You kissed me."

"To prove a point."

"You kissed me," Rodney said again.

"And you didn't like it so you're not gay," John said hands smugly on hips, and really what was it going to take to get McKay to drop this entirely crazy notion and leave John's room already.

"I..." McKay stopped and licked his lips. "I'm really not into rough sex, so of course I didn't like it."

John's hands dropped from his hips, and he stared at Rodney in shock. "You..."

"I think," Rodney said, "that if you really want to prove your point, you should kiss me again, but this time not so rough. If I don't like it, I'll concede the point that I'm unlikely to enjoy gay sex."

John continued to stare at Rodney. Rodney stared back, looking by turns smug and scared and...hopeful?

John's heart began to pound and even though he knew this was a horribly bad idea, he stepped closer to Rodney. "Okay, but don't forget you asked for it," he said, and taking Rodney's head in a much gentler grasp, he lowered his head and pressed his lips to Rodney's.

A shock of heat flared through his body, down his spine, and straight into his cock. Christ! He needed to pull back, put distance between himself and Rodney, and he was just about to do it, break the kiss that had deepened all on its own accord, when Rodney made a mewling sound deep in his throat and opened his mouth.

John moaned and allowed his tongue to sweep into Rodney's hot, eager mouth. His tongue brushed across Rodney's and fireworks went off behind his eyelids. He'd always thought that was hyperbole, but, of course, with Rodney, he'd see Roman Candles and Rockets and every other stupid cliché. He pulled back from the kiss only to dive in again, missing the taste of Rodney as soon as it was gone, but when Rodney pressed his hips against John and John felt the hardness there, he gasped and pulled away.

Rodney looked at him with wide, dilated, scared-looking eyes, and John licked his lips and looked back, and wondered if he had the same stunned expression on his face.

"Um," Rodney said.

"Yeah," John said.

"That was, um, good."

"Yeah," John said again.

"I think I might be gay, after all," and the look of complete shock on his face made John want to laugh, except he was too busy trying not to freak out, because, he'd been sure that Rodney would react poorly to the kiss.

Wow, he'd been totally wrong there.

"So, uh," Rodney said, and licked his lips drawing John's eyes there and making his cock twitch, and before he could change his mind, he leaned in for another kiss.

Rodney slipped his arms around him, and strong, broad hands found their way under his t-shirt. John's knees almost buckled when Rodney touched his bare skin, and a rather embarrassing moan escaped. He withdrew his mouth from Rodney's and began to trace a line of kisses across Rodney's whiskered jaw and down his neck. Rodney gasped and tilted his head to the side allowing John access to all the sensitive skin, and when John nibbled on Rodney's earlobe and blew into his ear, Rodney bucked into his hips and a flash of raw pleasure fired from John's cock.

He was working his own hands under Rodney's shirt when the scientist started pushing him away, pulling back.

"Rodney?" John said in confusion when Rodney took a step back from him.

"I...I don't think I can do this," Rodney said.

John felt as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over him.

"Oh," he said and took his own step back. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He'd known to keep away from McKay. He'd known it. He'd known that Rodney was straight. Now, not only was his secret out, but he'd just lost his friend.

"Look," Rodney said with a manic look in his eyes. "I know when I started talking about turning gay I said it was because I wanted some easy sex, but I can't do that. Not with you. I thought I could, but..." He hesitated, licked his lips, and then squared his shoulders as if gathering his courage. "You're not some random soft scientist that I don't know and don't care about. You're, well, you're you, and, honestly, John, I don't want to lose your friendship over casual sex."

John stared at him, and his heart started pounding in his chest again. "And if the sex wasn't casual?"

Rodney blinked in surprise, and said, "Uh, you, and, uh, me?" His voice went up an octave on the last word, and John nodded his head, hope and fear and dread and desire all fighting for dominance in his mishmash of emotions.

"Really? You want to..." his hand motioned between the two of them. "You want to do this?"

"Yeah, Rodney, I want to do this."

"And... and it would be, um, a relationship? Just the two of us?"

John thought for all of a second about how long it had been since he'd wanted anybody that wasn't Rodney McKay, and smiled. "Just the two of us."

John didn't know what he was expecting, but he wasn't expecting Rodney to pounce, but pounce Rodney did, and then that big, noisy, wonderful, talented mouth was doing things to him that left John gasping for air, and then his knees hit the side of the bed even though he hadn't been aware he was even moving, for Christ's sake, and then he was flat on his back on his bed and Rodney was on top of him, and, Jesus, who knew McKay even had a clue what to do in bed, but, god, that fucking mouth!

Rodney started pushing John's shirt up and John tried to help, but somewhere along the way he had completely lost control of the situation so he just allowed Rodney to strip off his shirt. It went flying across the room, and Rodney started licking his way down John's chest. John just closed his eyes and felt, and, god, it'd been so long since he'd felt anything with a partner other than fleeting pleasure, but with Rodney every single nerve-ending was on fire. Rodney licked and nipped and sucked until John was shaking with his need, and then Rodney was at the waistband of his trousers and John felt him undoing the buttons and yanking down pants and boxers, and he was free, and didn't that feel good?

Rodney stripped off his shoes and tugged his pants and underwear the rest of the way off, and then he settled in beside John and then everything went quiet. After the frenetic energy Rodney had been displaying, his sudden stillness worried John, and he lifted his head and looked down. Rodney was leaning on one elbow just staring at John's cock. John opened his mouth to ask what was wrong when Rodney lifted his hand and lightly ran one finger up and down the hard length. When he didn't do anything more, John lifted himself up on his elbows and said, "Rodney?"

Rodney looked up at him, and his eyes were worried. "I've never, you know, given a blow job before."

John felt a little bit disappointed because the thought of that clever, talented mouth sucking him off... John had to close his eyes to get himself back under control before he could say, "You don't have to, Rodney."

John's hips jerked when Rodney wrapped his hand around his cock and began to stroke, long, slow pulls up and down that had John wanting to come right now. But then Rodney levered himself over until his mouth hovered above John's cock, and he glanced up at John and said, "You'll tell me if I do anything wrong?"

John could only nod, because, Christ, Rodney's hand was driving him insane and then Rodney opened that wide, wide mouth of his - a mouth that John had long thought was made for giving blow jobs - and swallowed John down.

John flopped back down on the bed and Rodney began to experiment. First he gave a few tentative sucks, and then he pulled back until he had just the head of John's cock in his mouth and he sucked again, gently, followed by a lick across the tip and a suck that had John moaning. He could feel Rodney's smirk and if he hadn't just been turned into a quivering mass, he'd have reached down and smacked the smug sonofabitch, but Rodney was still jacking him and licking around the ridge hitting hot spots John didn't even know he had, and all John could do was whimper and try to keep from thrusting into Rodney's mouth.

It didn't take long before Rodney had a rhythm going of sucking and licking and stroking so damned good that John's toes curled involuntarily. He could feel the pressure building and soon he couldn't stop himself from thrusting, but Rodney merely pulled back enough so that John wouldn't choke him, and sucked and pumped until John's back arched and he came and came and came.

Rodney had pulled off after the first taste of John's semen, and so John's stomach was well-coated with the sticky fluid, but he couldn't seem to care. Instead he reached down and pulled Rodney to him for a kiss.

"It was okay?" Rodney asked, and John smiled at the slightly worried look on Rodney's face. It wasn't often that John got to see Rodney unsure of his capabilities.

John pulled him in for another kiss, and said, "For a newly gay man, you give great head."

Rodney looked searchingly at him for a second and then his face took on a smug expression. "Well, of course, I am a quick study."

John laughed and leaned over and kissed him again. He ran his hand down Rodney's side and said, "Someone is overdressed."

Rodney grinned and pulled his head down for another kiss, and then said, "Maybe we should do something about that."

"Mmm," John said. He kissed Rodney again, and then began to slowly, methodically strip every piece of clothing off of Rodney, kissing his way up his belly as the shirt was lifted, stopping long enough to lick at sensitive nipples, detouring across Rodney's collarbone to nibble and suck at tender skin, and then back to that oh-so-talented mouth.

When he at last tugged Rodney's pants and shorts off, he spread Rodney's legs and worked his way up, listening to Rodney's monologue of "yes, there, wait, yes, right there, oh god do that again," until he reached the top of Rodney's thighs. Rodney's cock was impressive without being too big or too thick. Perfect, John thought, and he shivered at the thought of it driving into him.

John's hands stroked up and down Rodney's inner thighs until they reached the two soft balls that hung under the hard shaft. He caressed them and then sucked first one and then the other into his mouth while Rodney moaned out his approval. John let the balls slip from his mouth and licked a long stripe up the large vein on the back of Rodney's cock. When he reached the top, he twirled his tongue into the slit, lapping up the drop of pre-come.

Rodney whispered his name like it was a prayer and dug his fingers into the blankets when John took the head into his mouth and sucked. His tongue circled around the ridge, probing, tasting, finding all of Rodney's sweet spots, and then he opened the back of his throat, took Rodney all the way in and swallowed around the sensitive head making Rodney cry out in pleasure.

It didn't take long after that. Pulling back slightly, he continued to suck while stroking at the base of Rodney's cock until Rodney stiffened, and for the first time in his life, John allowed another man to come in his mouth. He swallowed everything down and gently sucked Rodney through the aftershocks.

When Rodney was finished, John crawled up the bed and lay on his side beside Rodney, his head propped up on one hand. He silently watched Rodney as he recovered from his climax, and couldn't wipe the smile from his face. He was pretty sure it was reflecting his feeling of smugness. His hypothesis was confirmed when Rodney finally opened his eyes and then promptly rolled them in disgust.

"Yes, yes, Colonel. On top of all your other talents, you give excellent blow jobs."

John chuckled and leaned in for a kiss. When he pulled back, Rodney pulled away from him a little, and John frowned at the worried expression on Rodney's face.

"What is it," he asked apprehensively.

"Uh, I have to tell you something, and I hope you won't feel angry or betrayed."

John pulled back a bit, and said, "This wasn't your first homosexual encounter?" John didn't know how he felt about that. A little disappointed, he thought.

"No, no," Rodney said hurriedly. "Believe me, I've never been with another man. Never wanted to really."

"Then what's your big confession?" John asked and reached out to run the back of his hand along Rodney's beard-roughened cheek. Rodney pulled away and sat up, looking even more nervous now.

"The, um, whole thing about me turning gay and asking someone from the soft sciences to have sex with me?" He waited until John nodded his head in acknowledgment. "Yeah, see, that, um, that was just to see what you'd do."

John slowly raised himself up, and said, "What do you mean, Rodney?"

"Look, don't get mad, but, well, I really was tired of not having sex, and well, we've been flirting practically since we met, and I thought that maybe, you, um, you know, liked me."

"Liked you," John repeated.

"Yes, but you never did anything about it, and whenever I had time to think about it – which, let's face it, wasn't often because three men couldn't do my job, and yet I do my job plus go out on missions, and-"

"Rodney," John interrupted.

Rodney stopped his rant, and brought himself back under control. "Well, I thought maybe you weren't completely straight, but then there was Chaya and you seemed to like women, so maybe you were straight. But then, like I said, there was what I was pretty sure was flirting between us, and I thought that maybe if you weren't completely straight but you thought that I was, that even if you were interested you might have decided to, you know, do nothing."

"You are straight, Rodney," John said automatically, and then he stopped at Rodney's smug smile, and shook his head. "Okay, you were straight."

"And I think I still am," Rodney said, and John felt something, some baby feeling he hadn't even known he'd carried, die in him. But even before John could pull away, put his mask of 'I'm cool and I don't give a fuck' back in place, Rodney said, completely oblivious to John's turmoil, "Well, except for you, because, see, it's you I'm gay for. I mean, I wouldn't want to do this with any other man, but I did think I'd like to do it with you. So when I heard Cadman and Wainwright talking about Queer as Folk, I got the idea of, um, conducting an experiment by telling you I was going to turn gay and ask other men for sex, just to see how you'd react. I, um, hoped you really did want to have sex with me yourself, and if I was offering up easy, casual, no obligation sex, you'd go ahead and make a move. Although to be completely honest, I really didn't think you would, which explains my shock when you did. But then I realized I couldn't just do casual sex with you, because, well, um..." He hesitated as if unsure how much he should say, but then blurted out, "Can I just say how happy it makes me that you don't want to do casual with me?"

John felt his heart twist a little, and he leaned forward and captured Rodney's mouth. It took very little effort for him to push Rodney back down onto his back and to crawl on top of him. And then he was clinging to Rodney and Rodney was holding onto him, and he said, "You're such a fucking mad genius, McKay."

And Rodney sighed happily under him.


The End